`•.¸¸.•´´¯`••Crouching Sushi, Hidden Noodle - A Kung Fu Tragic Love Story`•.¸¸.•´´¯`••
Original Play by Yisu (Not really Old Man Sushi wrote it.), sponsored by Old Man Sushi (Best Sushi in all the land.) Performed at the Summer Festival Introduction <Twelve cats raced onto the blood soaked pavement, each one carrying a large crate, and a few of them dragging a medium sized stage onto the blood soaked stone. Within minutes a stage was erected, curtains lined the three sides facing the bleachers, and there was a wooden lattice construct with ropes tangled throughout that sat hap hazardly on top of the stage. One lone nekoyami, Yisu, came forth from the curtain when done and stood off to the side, notes in hand to read from. She cleared her voice. > "Two stalls, both alike in dignity, In the fair Empire, where we lay our scene, From ancient grudge break to new fighting," <Narrator rifles through her notes, obviously missing a page. After finding an acceptable place to continue, she says in a louder, over dramatic tone to cover up her mistake.> "Do with their death bury their stall owners' strife. The fearful passage of their death-mark'd love, And the continuance of their emperess' rage, Which, but their children's end, nought could remove, Is now the twelve hours' traffic of our stage..." < A nekoyami peaks its head out and whispers something to her. Yisu throws up her paws.> "Thirty minute traffic to our stage.....you know what?! The End. On with the play." ------------------------------------------------- Act 1 Post 1 - Scuffle between two stalls The curtains pull back and the stage is set. Two stalls, with child like signs painted across the top stood center stage. One was called "Crouching Sushi" and the other "Hidden Noodle". The lighting implied it was dusk as the curtains were partially set to block the sun, dimming the stage. Three cats stood in front of each stall, with the Sushi stand housing a fourth female nekoyami, who kept a concerned expression on her face as she worried about the sushi gang. "I am Yan, of the Noodle shop. And I say touching the Empress gives 1,000 years of good fortune!," spoke the leader of the noodle shop gang, his 'gang' were dressed as stock boys. "And I am Ishi, not of the Sushi shop, but I like sushi! And I say the Empress is the Fortune of the Nekoyami, and you dare not sully her celestial body!" This cat was followed by two more stockboys, though they carried signs emoting that they smelled like fish. One of the Noodle gang spoke up from behind Yan, "Do you bite your paw at us, sir?!" Ishi spoke up, "I do bite my paw at you, sir." The Noodle gang rose up, hoisted on ropes, paws spread wide, and legs crooked to kick, but Yan held up his paws out to his sides, holding them back. "We shall not disrupt the small peace of our two stalls. Make haste with your insult....for now." His tone ended ominous, and he and his gang fled the scene. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Post 2 - Romeo and Juliet Meet **The Narrator clears her throat and simply said, "Later that evening."** Yan walks up to the noodle stall, shoulders slumped. He seems discouraged, not angry from the previous meeting. He sits on a small stool that he usually sits on during business hours when it is slow. He sighs and raises his head up to the sky forlornly, "Why must noodle and sushi fight?! Why must they put our Fortune on a pedastal, and not realize she was brought to our realm to bless us with her heavenly body." Out of the shadows the female cat comes out, hearing his words, her face showed that she believed in his words. "Yan-san, I believe what you say." she almost whispers this, her whole demeanor overly feminine and subservient. Yan's face lights up. They had never spoken. She was an ocean away as they both managed their stalls, just a few feet a part. He whispers, almost to himself, “O, she doth teach the stone lanterns to burn bright.” He stands up and stand a meter away from her. "I am Zizi, good pilgrim." As she blushed, why she called him pilgrim, no one knew. "I know your name. And I have admired you from a far. May this pilgrim pray at the shrine of your lips? May I receive a blessing only the holy Empress and you may bestow? Thus from my lips, by thine, my sin is purged." Yan steps forward, and gives her a rough tongued lick on her muzzle, then darts away. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Act 2 Post 3 - Romeo and Juliet sniff catnip together **The Narrator stands up from her seated position, and says half heartedly after taking a few shots of sake, her once twelve hour play ruined, "Two days later, that night."** Zizi, climbs up upon the Sushi stall's roof. Breathless, she looks to a low hanging moon with some wooden stars, dangling from a rope. She reaches out with a paw forlornly and says, "O Yan, Yan, wherefore art thou Yan? Deny thy stall and refuse the old man; Or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love and I’ll no longer be of the sushi stand.” From the shadows of the noodle stall, Yan steps out and admires his fair intended. Zizi continues into the night, "‘Tis but thy stall that is my enemy: Thou art thyself, though not of the Noodle stand. What’s a noodle? It is nor hand nor foot; Nor arm nor face nor any other part belonging to a nekoyami.". Yan steps forward further and speaks from his heart, "I take thee at thy word. Call me but sushi, and I’ll be new baptized. Henceforth I never will be Yan." Zizi started at his voice, but he did not hesitate as he climbed the side of the stall, nimble as his kind tended to be. Staring off into the wooden moon, Yan pulls out a small canister and opens it, "Let us share in this catnip. Let us express our love for one another." At that, both dip a paw and sniff the 'nip. They then stared longly into each other's eyes and started to yowl all through and into the night. The curtain closed to setup for the next part. -------------------------------- Post 4 - Fight between both stalls **The Narrator grimaces, as her dialog was butchered to make for a thirty minute play. She didn't even bother to stand up, and or even wait until she was done with her sake before saying, "The very next day."** The curtain reopens and shows both gangs in front of their respective stalls. They are in their own huddle, the leader between their own pair of stockboys. Yan's group is lit from above by a lantern hanging precariously by a rope. "I say our gang's name should be the Montamews!" said one of the sushi stock cats. "No no, it should be the Jets," Said the other. Yan cut them both off, "We don't need a name. We are the Hidden Noodle! Let us end this!" --------- Their light dimmed, and a lantern lit above Ishi's gang. -------- One of the stock cats said, "I want our name to be the Catpulets." The other two just looked at him. "I say we call ourself the Sharks....cause we have teef!" exclaimed the other one. Ishi shook his head solemnly, "Enough fighting about names. This glorious stall's owner, the Old Man, named us when he named his shop Crouching Sushi. May the fortunes bless him."" As with all philosophical debates, things have degraded into violence between the two gangs. They didn't exchange words. One believed in Luck, the other, a Fortune. This fight will determine who spoke true. Both gangs leap into the air with ropes from the rig above, the hanging lanterns bouncing and shaking dangerously as the entire top of the stage shook from the strain of six nekoyami swinging. To their credit, they looked graceful, though their aim was off, as kicks and flying punches swung wide from their target. One stock cat, a noodle stock cat just twirled in place on his rope. Finally it all ended, when Yan scooped up a potted plant and crashed it into the sushi stall, making it crumble into a heap. All six cats yelped, so did the others off stage that were handling the ropes, and the 6 came crashing to the stage. Both pairs of stock cats recovered and scooted their leaders off in opposite directions. One of the sushi cats yelled from offstage, "A plague o’ both your stalls!" ----------------------------------------- Act 3 Post 5 - Refusal to be torn a part. The curtains draw around to the sides so that there is only an opening in the front. Both Yan and Zizi come walking from on stage out of the entrance, front and center to the crowd. Each is carrying a package. They kneel on the ground and stare into one another. Zizi speaks first, "My beloved Yan. You will be exiled for the destruction of the Old Man's stall. The Empress is benevolent, but she also is wrathful for those that disturb her peace and serenity." The tiny female nekoyami reached her paw into the air and over dramatically yowled in sorrow. She continues, "I can not live knowing we must be apart." Yan interrupts her with a paw of his on her muzzle, "Shhhhh, I too can't live without you." He opens up his package, and old moldy noodles lay in the pouch, "I brought this, so that we may be together in the heavens, if not on the earth." She in turn opened her sushi, and the smell of week old rotted fish wafted to the play's spectators. "I have brought my Master's old left over sushi, that I tucked away for such occasion. Take what I give, and I shall take what you give. We shall reunite in the Heavens." Both nekoyami took the other's package. Yan made a genuine face of disgust, and he scooped an old pile of mush sushi and he ate it. Quickly. And just as quickly, he stood up, ran back to the stage, a small crash, and a wretching sound came from the back. Moments later, he came stumbling out. "O true master of the sushi. Thy drugs are quick. Thus with a kiss, I die." He goes to lick her one last time, but she smells the rotten fish and barfs, and shy's away. Yan falls to the ground dead. Zizi, takes the package of noodles, gags, and then says, "O happy noodle, This is thy sheath: there rot further, and let me die." She then ate the noodle. She then sprinted on stage and repeated the process as Yan before. Coming back to the front, she wiped her mouth, then fell over dead. Solemnly, a nekoyami comes from the curtained stage and stands over the two dead nekoyami. She is dressed gaudily, and she was walking on stilts. "I am she who was once Empress, Fortune of Luck and nekoyami. The tragedy today, is not this love affair that produced chaos and destruction in its wake, but that both gangs were right. I should be venerated as a fortune, but I have come to this mortal realm to bestow my blessing on the worthy, my beloved nekoyami." At that, the rest of the cast, and the back stage, twelve in total, came to the front, and all the nekoyami bowed. Yisu, frustrated that she had to cut a twelve hour play down to thirty minutes was sprawled out drunk at the corner of the stage. Comments are closed.
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