Cabbala Chronicles - Issue 011 Sincadere Spring ![]() It has indeed been a while, hasn't it, dear reader? Surely, you've missed me twice as much as I've missed you. Fear not, for yours truly is back with the most succulent of news. And let me assure you, I do have a treat for you all. A couple of moons ago, Her Fluffiness, Daniella “The Mischief Terror” Travesty, announced her temporary retirement from the most corrupt and coveted office on Sincadere. Yes, dear reader, for two whole weeks, the office of Archon of the Cabbala is open for those brave enough to toss their names into the fire and avoid getting stabbed in the process. Her temporary leave of absence has left some of the imps in the caves tossing rumors of a mysterious ailment. Those in the Bound Elf may have heard she contracted a rather aggressive case of athlete’s hoof. The shadows of the Horde whispered she just got treated for mad-elf disease. While the little minxes of the brothel suggested she got a rare case of stiffed-tail. All, I can assure you, are lies; our beloved Archon is just in need of some well-deserved rest. In this soon-to-be temporary absence of power, the thundering voices of Sapphira and an undisclosed male were heard in a lurid fight for dominance and of course, for the right to lay their buttocks on the same warm throne where our faun’s butt usually seats. Fire, damnations, a goblet of wine, and an epithet or two were thrown in this argument, but the truth is… no real victor was decided. Most worrying of all, is that this display has ignited others to circle the throne like vultures around a carcass. Some with worrying agendas, like Lily, our sweet bouncy elf, who clearly stated her intention to ban the use of pants or any garments below the waistline. Or a certain shady character by the name of Rune who demanded mandatory taxation on breathing rights or brutal imprisonment. Of course, our journalists have also heard of the occasional pyromaniac who desires the caves to be turned into a two-week bonfire. And last, but not least, those voices who will use this time to declare war on the surface dwellers. Whatever the case, 'tis safe to say, the caves would soon be lively. Perhaps too lively for those that live above. Our best hopes for the hasteful return of our beloved Archon. May she encounter the caves pristine and more importantly… still standing when she returns from her pampering voyage. Sleep with one eye open. R. Hangfire. Before we continue, I would like the opportunity to introduce to you dear reader, our newest little helper. Madame Meddleton. Who demanded payment in spanks rather than coin, a deal that we in the Cabbala Chronicles could not refuse. Her professional journalism precedes her, which is why her column: "Rumors Bloody Rumors" would be dedicated solely to investigating the most delicious gossip and rumors about those that live in Sincadere. Without further adeu.. i give you.. Madame Meddleton. Demons and Orgies and Trouble, oh my! All Cabbala twitters with the news of the impending vacation of the Archon...or IS it a vacation? The announcement has touched off a flurry of whispers as to the reason for this absence. Conjectures include illness, a failed coup attempt that left injuries from which she must heal, a rendezvous with the leader of another land. None of these idle musings have any evidence to support them, but wagging tongues persist in believing any thing other than her stated reason. Various officers have been jockeying for the position with a number of applications already submitted. Also, numerous people reported what seemed to be a huge battle in the Throne Room itself, with the winner unclear. It's rumored that some people may have applied just for fun, but with our Archon's penchant for poisoning, perhaps they might watch their beverages for a while. A party held recently by our illustrious Horde Reaper Uhar and Spike's wife Mox for the long-serving manager and red pleasure demon Spike of the Bound Elf was a rousing success with many examples of lewd behavior and pleasure seeking witnessed and enjoyed. It's said that the Bound Elf's attendance has picked up since that party with many possibly hoping for a repeat. Indeed, Spike has been seen dusting the furniture - might that mean another orgy in the offing? One can only hope. Several people have noticed a new addition to the land in the form of a colony of rabbits, who have opened a bar for use by all residents of Sincadere. The bunnies seem particularly affectionate and have worked hard to set up the supplies necessary for their success. The Bound Elf has added another manager, Runefang Haefnir. While just starting at the Elf, rumors suggest that he has returned after an absence caused by his wild behavior as notorious member of a pack of ruffians. One can only hope that we see such behavior again, as the caves seem a mere echo of their former chaotic days. And of course, the usual rumors abound across the cave, making us pant for more details, but unfortunately, I can only provide snippets to whet your appetite. For example, what high ranking member of Cabbala was seen slipping into the College, then later leaving with a tipsy friend for a night of drunken debauchery? Or...was that just a Tuesday? Until next time, I bid you Darkest Eve, Madame Meddleton
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