"Infernal Love" with Miss Scarlet
Dear Miss Scarlet A number of us regular folk have heard talk of a rather concerning medical issue within the leadership of our realm. We have heard that a rash is spreading through the royals and leaders of the regions within Sincadere. This may just be the rumor mill grinding the flour of lies and misinformation but many of us are concerned as to the health of our leadership and also the possibility of the rash spreading to the regular, common folk. We have heard that the rash is sexual in nature and may have been spread through the various meetings that the leaders attend but we also know that some of the leaders, mainly those filthy beasts in the Cabbala, tend to fornicate with whoever they capture I suppose what I'm asking is, are we in danger of losing our leaders and are we looking at realm-wide pandemic of the itchy bits? Thank you, Burning with curiosity Dear Burning with Curiosity, I received your letter with something of a sense of alarm tempered with caution. While I would be hesitant to raise the cry of a pandemic, these happenings must be treated with the utmost seriousness, for if disregarded what could well be just a little outbreak of the crotch rot amongst some decadent nobles might well grow into a new plague. I would offer assurance to Burning that a bit of the whore's blossom amongst the leadership is usually nothing to be worried about. A surprising amount of diplomatic work between nations to say nothing of their internal affairs is carried out in the bedrooms of ambassadors, diplomats, nobility, and officials. Many a treaty and trade agreement has been hammered out over a barebacked ride or sorted by a cunning linguist and a touch of the drip is seen as the cost of doing business. To err on the side of caution, Miss Scarlet did reach out to some of her contacts in the kingdom of Helheim as well as the Jade Lotus Empire and was given assurances that all is under control and the nature of the malady has been greatly exaggerated. Which is exactly what I would expect to be told by leaderships eager to keep a lid on their affairs. In the interest of thoroughness Miss Scarlet also reached out to the Cabbala Amarita even though they are notoriously close-lipped on their dealings. When asked about the recent rumors of disease and the possibility of their origins in the Cabbala, Miss Scarlet's anonymous source had only a veiled "Wait and see" accompanied by maniacal laughter and gnashing of fangs, followed by a pointed commentary on the sexual proclivities of other kingdoms leadership which is not fit to be printed in this esteemed periodical. With any official word on the matter dubious at best, Miss Scarlet offers the following advice: Discuss sexual history with any potential partners and don't be shy about regular check ups with your local physician, cleric, or healers guild. When in doubt, abstinence is always a best practice to avoid bedroom bugs, and readers dismayed at that prospect can always send in five copper and a self-addressed envelope to receive Miss Scarlet's newest publication "101 Ways to Go Fuck Yourself; A Manual of Self-Love." Until next time, dear readers, I remain, Miss Scarlet Comments are closed.
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